Thursday, November 26, 2009

Thankful Thursday Thanksgiving

Today is Thanksgiving Day. I will spend the day with my wonderful children and Kyle, my best friend whom I adore. I will cook a meal that will be full of nutrition and pleasure (aka not nutrition). I will be in a warm home, with many many comforts at my disposal. I will call family members who are so far away in miles, but available at the push of a button. I may even get to "see" some family through on line chatting.

Blessed. That is my life. I am so very thankful that I have so much... so many necessities and extras.... so very many blessings.... I know there are those in this country and world who do not have as much to be thankful for!

I plan to spend the day focused on my blessings and what I have to be thankful for...

I hope you and yours are equally blessed this holiday.

God Bless.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Thankful Thursday 2

Today, the thing most on my mind is health. As my girls have been sick the past two weeks, I have been feeling stressed, overwhelmed, exhausted and beat down. When little ones are sick, it is so hard on the parents... you want to make them feel better and to take the best care of them you can, but you quickly become exhausted. I find it trying to keep my patience in balance when they are so needy, though I know this need stems from their illness, not my childs inner demon trying to drive me crazy (though i do have to remind myself of this a couple times a day).

I am thankful that I have never had to bring either of my kiddos to the ER, thankful that my husband helps on this a bit... but mostly it is due to their good health. We have not had any major major illness or accidents. H1N1 was the worst this past week, but we made it through to the other side!!!

I am thankful I live somewhere where health care is accessible to me, and that I feel confident in the care provided. Not everyone has this, and that is a tragedy. Especially young children.

This seems like something dull to be thankful for in times like these, at the same time, it is on the forefront of my mind!!!

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Thankful Thursday 2

So, technically this post is a little late, as it is not really Thursday anymore.. but thanks to blogspot letting me date it when ever I like, you all will never know the difference, right?

This Thankful Thursday I am thankful for my extended family... on both sides... or, on all sides.... :) At our last MOPS meeting (Mothers of Preschoolers, a moms group I am part of) the topic we discussed was family, specifically extended family. We talked about how our relationships with members of our family change as we become parents and they become parents or grandparents/aunts/uncles.

In preparation for this meeting and then during and after, I have thought a lot about family recently. We moved back to Oregon to be closer to family, as we wanted our little one (only one at the time), to know her family... especially grandparents. We are blessed to be "near" many family members (both kyles brothers and his parents are really a drive away.. plus my dad and one of my sisters). I look forward to the kiddos growing up knowing each other and having memories of playing with their cousins.

In terms of my relationships with my family and Kyle's family, they have changed a lot through the years... as a result of many things- time, children, etc. I do think having kids has brought me even closer to my sisters, though i think time has really been the factor there. My outlook on their parenting has certainly changed as I navigated this road... it is harder than it looks, and many times I have had to sheepishly eat my words or thoughts for what I had said or thought before I had kids. I also think I have grown closer to my sister in law since she had a baby.. not sure if it is because we both are moms as much as our schedules more align so chatting on the phone is easier. plus, she is just such an easy person to talk to and be around...

My MIL and FIL are great. They are caring, loving people who will do anything for you. There are times when living closer has challenged me, but I am so very thankful to be a part of this family. they are so such good people, and have raised amazing children who are now inspiring adults. I love Kyle.. I love the man he is, and I know this is because of how his parents raised him. I love that my children adore their grandparents. and they are adored.

as for my parents. you know, time has healed a lot of wounds.... forgiveness is key. but the reality is this, there was a lot of time missed and you cannot get that back. while forgiveness is possible, forgetting is not. and thus, there will always be that missing in my relationship with my parents. I do not carry anger any more, rather choose to look forward. There are moments when I think about what could have been, and I do feel cheated. In the end, though, this is true: i am proud of the person I am ... the life I am living, the family we have built. And I would not change my past, as it has help guide me to where I am now. And I am so very blessed.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Thankful Thursday 1

Since it is November, and this is the month we celebrate Thanksgiving... and it is right before Advent begins.. I wanted to focus more this month on the blessings in my life and what I have to be thankful for... and let me tell you it is a lot.

For the first thankful thursday, I thought of God. Yes, God. You know, if you knew me back in high school.. or even college, this may surprise you. I didn't grow up religious, and even at one point questioned His existence..not in a passing, angry way.. but in a serious, searching way. I was at a point in my life where I was searching. I came to a true crossroad in my heart... I new something was missing in my life, and I wanted to believe and let my faith lead me... yet I was afraid. Afraid to relinquish the control that I thought I had.. afraid that if I let my faith lead me, as it should, I could no longer control my future.... but then I had the amazing realization that faith does not make you lose control, it rather shows you who is really in control, and that you are not losing anything.. rather gaining Him. Gaining the Father we all need.

I am thankful that He led me to join the church, led me to open my heart and begin living the life He had planned for me. God also led me to let go of anger, hurt, and other feelings that were hardening my heart and keeping me from living the life I was supposed to and from being the person I wanted and should be.

I still struggle daily with issues of control.... and with growing my faith. I worry about raising children who will truly know God, love God and be a blessing to Him and all those they meet. Again, this worrying is not necessary...but like all people, I am a sinful being and continually fall short... but then I get back up and keep trying, as He wants us to.

I am thankful God is the center of our family (though again, sometimes I forget and think I am.. :) ), and that with Him, all things are possible.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Hippie Chicks here we come

So, I did it.. I signed up for the Hippie Chick Half Marathon. It is mothers day weekend 2010... so, i have plenty of time to get ready for the 13 miles. The race is in Champoeg Park, which is near our house... we will probably camp there for the weekend.. as it is a great place. I am so excited to do this, and have quite a few wonderful women I know racing too!! Should be a fun event for us, regardless of how long we take to finish!!! :)